If I were in your place .....
You would have done what?
I believe that phrase should be wiped off from the English language since it so misused. Usually this abominable phrase signifies that someone has made a blunder when considering the best course of action when presented with a dilemma e.g.
Person 1: It was either me taking all that abuse at this job or settling for a lower paid one. I chose the lower paid one.
Person 2: Are you nuts?! Don't you see the economy is so bad? If I were in your place ....
We all know what Person 2 would have done now don't we? A lot of people seem to froget when saying that phrase (If I were in your place) that had they been in the place of the other they would have done exactly as the other person would have done, because all the factors don't change and they would have come to the same conclusion. Person 2 seems to forget that had they been Person 1's position the external and internal factors that Person 1 is facing would still be the same the only thing that has changed would be the physical presence of Person 2 instead of Person 1. Two different objects occupy unique spaces in time and no one else can occupy that space except for the designated object. It's like a lock and key; one unique design fits a specific lock, so too is one unique event specific to a definite person. You can change that person with Tom, Dick or Harry and the result would be the same, the only thing that has changed would be the outward appearance the inward experience remains the same no matter what. So had Person 2 in some way taken up Person 1's space he would have be subjected to the forces of Person 1 and therefore arriving at the same conclusion as that of Person 1.
Next time, don't say that "had you been in the other's place" you would have done so and so because that is impossible. You would have ended up doing the exact same thing. Instead it would be much better to say "Had I your options I would have chosen so and so" because that shifts the focus from the unique place (which is occupied by one specific person at any one time) with constant forces (internally and externally) to a unique experience to a different place, and thus you would be entitled to tell us how you would have reacted had the options been presented to you.
I believe that phrase should be wiped off from the English language since it so misused. Usually this abominable phrase signifies that someone has made a blunder when considering the best course of action when presented with a dilemma e.g.
Person 1: It was either me taking all that abuse at this job or settling for a lower paid one. I chose the lower paid one.
Person 2: Are you nuts?! Don't you see the economy is so bad? If I were in your place ....
We all know what Person 2 would have done now don't we? A lot of people seem to froget when saying that phrase (If I were in your place) that had they been in the place of the other they would have done exactly as the other person would have done, because all the factors don't change and they would have come to the same conclusion. Person 2 seems to forget that had they been Person 1's position the external and internal factors that Person 1 is facing would still be the same the only thing that has changed would be the physical presence of Person 2 instead of Person 1. Two different objects occupy unique spaces in time and no one else can occupy that space except for the designated object. It's like a lock and key; one unique design fits a specific lock, so too is one unique event specific to a definite person. You can change that person with Tom, Dick or Harry and the result would be the same, the only thing that has changed would be the outward appearance the inward experience remains the same no matter what. So had Person 2 in some way taken up Person 1's space he would have be subjected to the forces of Person 1 and therefore arriving at the same conclusion as that of Person 1.
Next time, don't say that "had you been in the other's place" you would have done so and so because that is impossible. You would have ended up doing the exact same thing. Instead it would be much better to say "Had I your options I would have chosen so and so" because that shifts the focus from the unique place (which is occupied by one specific person at any one time) with constant forces (internally and externally) to a unique experience to a different place, and thus you would be entitled to tell us how you would have reacted had the options been presented to you.
posted by rehanmalick | 7:03 AM
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