Caught up in what??!!

I have talked about responsibility and accountability before and I will once again make mention of it but in a different light. What I am trying to get at is one of those “I was caught up in the moment” moments. Such a reply usually implies that the person using it is trying to wash their hands of the responsibilities of their actions and thus absolve of themselves any duties arising out of such a consequence. This is usually the case when a person commits an error or a faux pas because if a favourable result were to arise who would want to crown fate, chance or luck when one can easily take credit for it themselves. The question thus arises, who is to blame in such a circumstance? The answer is obvious, the person doing the action. You can’t absolve yourself of your own actions by blaming your emotions and expect to get away. Think about it for a moment, who governs your emotions? Why you do, of course! Do not tell me that emotions can’t be governed; they can surely be tamed and toned down. You need not deny their existence because that would be creating an illusion for yourself but accepting their reality and trying to work with and not without them is the key. We are emotional beings and so we will be governed by our emotions as well and there is nothing wrong with that because that is how we are made. Stating the moment was very “high” doesn’t mean your mental faculties were suspended, they were definitely taking a back seat but not dead so do not hide behind weak excuses to hide your deficiencies and weaknesses. You will come off as a weak individual who can’t control their emotions. I believe, as do so many others, that the strongest out of us all is the one who fights his inner demons and owns up to their faults in utmost honesty. That still isn’t enough though; you will find many people out there who own up to their faults but the truly strong and honest ones are those you actually do something about it. They rectify their actions for all times to come and try to minimize the damage done. If you don’t think you can do that much then you must content yourself with your weakness and think of strengthening yourself somehow.

One must be able to take responsibility for one’s actions as long as one carried them out with their faculties fully intact and if they can’t then they must try to convince themselves at the very least of their weakness and if they can’t even do that then may God help these animals because that is what they are; beasts in essence. There is no difference between them and an animal because neither thinks; they both just react to their instincts and desires. Just as the wild lion finds a lioness to mate with and fulfills its desires such people are much the same. We have a mind for us to use and not to be abused. I will make a confession here and I am not afraid of doing so, I am depressive and bipolar (a cooler name for bipolar is manic-depressive but that’s besides the point), and unlike the stereotype I am not crazy or loony or someone on a hair-trigger, I have a temper, yes, like all the other males in my family, but that in no way makes me crazy or psychotic as some people come to think and believe of us (the “us” refers to bipolars and not the males in my family). The point I am trying to make is that during my depressive phases I would usually go on a shopping spree usually squandering money over useless items always trying to justify my purchases but the thing which I realized pretty soon is that I am going to be held accountable for my actions no matter what. To whom or what I am held accountable is a debate for all you theologists and ontologists and I dare not get into that lest I digress. But like I said it doesn’t matter how I was feeling or not, my actions ultimately come back to me and describe myself and so I should be ready to bear the consequences of my actions. Justifying my sprees on my illness was a really weak way of hiding and trying to absolve myself of the blame. We all hate being blamed for something that might be associated with us, and quite naturally, I know I don’t want to have something on my conscience to bother me for a long time. But sometimes our desire to have an alibi or an excuse is so strong we fail to see our shortcomings and if we do not see our shortcomings we will never be able to improve our situation and much less ourselves.

The first step in trying to solve a problem is acknowledging there is a problem. Then you go about searching and weighing the options but the first and most important step is to identify the problem. I can say with full confidence and that I now know how to better solve my predicament and have taken care of it.You have to ask yourself the question that are you hiding behind some fake reason or are you really acquitted of doing such.